


Happy House

by septicfuck



Category: jacksepticeye
Genre: Depression, Divorce, Friendship, Mental Health Issues, Not Shippy, Post-Divorce, Smoking, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-21
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-06-14 05:05:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15381276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/septicfuck/pseuds/septicfuck
Summary: "How do you do it? Deal with so much negativity and not let it get you down?""Well, I am terribly cynical."Chase and Henrik have a brief, heartfelt chat over cigarette smoke.





	Happy House

**Author's Note:**

> I still don't know how AO3 works so I apologize if the formatting is substandard.

“Since when do you smoke?”

Henrik turned his head at the voice behind him, mildly startled, but relaxed when he realized it was only Chase. He chuckled wryly, then took a drag from his cigarette and allowed the smoke to lazily drift from his mouth as he responded.

“Since when do you drink yourself sick every other day?” A pause. “We all have our vices, I suppose.”

“Mm. S'pose so.”

If Chase didn't know that Henrik would have shot back an equally scathing observation, he would have made a crack about the irony of a doctor taking up an addiction that damaged the body so much. Then again, Henrik was always surprising people like that.

Henrik patted next to him on the doorstep. Chase took the seat. The midnight air was refreshingly cool against his skin. He licked his lips, then gestured vaguely.

“Uh, mind if I…?”

“By all means,” Henrik said, presenting the packet to him.

Chase nodded in appreciation and took one of the cigarettes. After he placed it into his mouth, he looked around momentarily for a lighter. Henrik motioned for him to lean over and lit the cigarette with his free hand. Chase gave a halfhearted thumbs up.

“Thanks, man,” he mumbled from around the cigarette.

He sucked the smoke into his lungs deeply and sighed, leaning forward slightly to relax his forearms on his thighs. Ash dropped between his sneakers. Henrik watched curiously from the side of his eye.

“I had not noticed you took up the habit yourself.”

“Yeah. Er, no, actually. I didn’t. Just… Can’t sleep. Been thinkin’ about things and it’s keeping me up.”

“I see.”

They sat for several minutes. Chase leaned his head back, exhaling lungfuls of smoke into the inky black sky as he stared upwards. Only the occasional crackling sounds of burning paper and tobacco kept total silence at bay.

Eventually, Chase looked back towards the ground. He cleared his throat.

“Um.”

Henrik raised an eyebrow yet said nothing. It was better, he figured, to allow Chase time to say exactly what he needed. He would have appreciated the same if it were him.

“It's just... I probably sound dumb, but I always do, so y'know, whatever—anyways. I used to point out the constellations to my kids? I memorized them just so I could show my kids if they were visible. And I won't lie, I didn't know a damn thing about space 'til then, on account of how long I spent on Wikipedia pages about it all. Orion, Ursa Minor, Lynx. Uh, Perseus.”

He was listing them off on his fingers. He took another drag while he paused.

"Looking up at the sky now makes me think about them. It's not like I don't see 'em, yeah, but visitation on weekends... That's nothing. I want to be a  _father,_ not a- a- a guest in my own household," he sputtered.

“Chase.”

Chase instantly shut his mouth. He could feel warmth spreading over his cheeks as he directed his gaze sideways. Rambling was one of his worst habits—now he'd gone and pissed someone off with his babble.

Yet again.

He dropped the nearly-finished cigarette onto the step below and ground it with the toe of his shoe. He prepared to stand. To his surprise, though, Henrik placed his free hand onto Chase's shoulder gently, preventing him from rising.

"Don't."

When Chase sneaked a look that way, Henrik gave him a fond smile. He was secretly relieved about that.

"I assure you I know how you are feeling. Divorce is difficult, to say the least. There is no right or wrong way to process your emotions during such a tumultuous time."

"Yeah... Yeah, so people say. I dunno. I just get really low, you know? Like—"

"Depressed?"

That caught Chase off guard. He blinked, then immediately began stumbling over himself to backtrack what he had said. Of course he wasn't depressed; that was a serious accusation to be slinging around. And besides, he was happy sometimes, at least he seemed to be.

Henrik shook his head.

"Do you eat enough? Sleep enough? Are you finding that you have no concentration, no interest in things that once captivated you, or you have constant feelings of sadness?"

Chase frowned. Although he would admit that he did experience those symptoms, and they truthfully did bother him, he didn't like the implication.

"Well, yeah, but that's normal stuff."

"It is not. Even I can tell that these are the types of things that are hindering you on a day-to-day basis." Henrik sighed. "You don't understand, Chase. You can accept that you have a problem without allowing it to define you."

Those few words struck a chord with Chase for some reason. He idly rubbed his beard, trying to take them in—holding them in his heart for later.

“...How do you do it, dude? Deal with so much negativity and not let it get you down?”

“Well, I am terribly cynical.”

"Hmm."

Chase gave Henrik a sidelong glance. "But really. You always look so put together. Even with your marriage and family stuff, and those issues with your job, and you-know-what a while back."

Henrik was looking off into the darkness. Somehow he looked melancholy. He finally flicked the cigarette into the bushes beside him, then stuffed the pack and lighter into his pocket.

He mused for a long moment.

“No, I'm really not. I suppress and numb my negative feelings. It hardly ever works out for me, yet I still do it. Allowing yourself to feel is infinitely better than trying to appear functional at all times. Remember that, Chase. Life will drag you down. Often. Things will seem unbearable. But what matters is that you feel, and hurt, and ultimately learn from the experience. This divorce of yours is an obstacle that you simply must overcome."

Henrik couldn't have been more than several years older than him, but he seemed like a great source of worldly wisdom to Chase right now.

"Shit," Chase choked out.

As though on instinct, Henrik immediately gave him a friendly rub on the shoulder, which only made tears well up even quicker. Chase groaned.

“Ugh. I won't lie—I did have a beer or two before I came out here."

"As your healthcare provider, I am absolutely appalled."

Chase's eyes lit up at the opportunity. "Says the doctor who smokes!"

Surprisingly, Henrik didn't react with a comeback; merely laughed. Warmly. It was like music to Chase's ears.

"Come, let's get inside. We can continue our conversation tomorrow. I fear you may catch a cold."

"Yeah right, old man."


End file.
